Finally time for another little piece of fiction. Based on RP that took place on Guild Wars 2 and thus not entirely my own creation, I can only take cred for this short-story format. Warning for foul language and nudity, I should perhaps say? 



Waking up in the middle of the night after a brutal round of whiskey drinking is never a pleasant affair. The throbbing head ache, the sickening stink of alcohol, the stiff discomfort from having  slept in an awkward position, the distant memories of the night before, all coming together to paint a picture of enjoyment and remorse in a vicious blend.

“Ah shit…” Jesse muttered to himself in an exquisite expression of agony. He raised his hands to rub swollen and lazy eyes, struggling to get them open. The pain told of a hangover, yet the slow spin of the world also revealed him to still be drunk. Fuck, how long had he slept?

It was dark and the room was unfamiliar. He was laying on a fairly comfortable bed but still clothed, his leather coat having bundled up awkwardly under his back. There was a soft and warm body next to him too, with a hand resting lovingly on his chest.

A menacing click brought Jesse’s mind to focus. He opened his eyes to stare down the barrel of a pistol. The sight swiftly jolted the man back to reality.

“Look! I…” Jesse started, throwing a glance at the naked woman nuzzled up against him. Naked. Woman. Fuck.

The man holding the gun did not seem particularly amused. His features were hard to make out in the darkness of the night but Jesse could see a scowling expression and the threat of violence in his eyes. A name flickered to life from the depths of Jesse’s memory. Jake?

“I don’t got a damned clue what she’s doing in this bed,” Jesse blurted out in a quick slurry of words. They hadn’t, had they? Fuck, he didn’t quite remember. “I remember me crashin’ in this bed and…her crashin’ in the other room! … or downstairs or… somethin’. She weren’t in here!”

The pistol wielding man sneered down at Jesse, unimpressed by the explanation. Jake, yes she had mentioned a Jake. He looked like a thug more than anything, with a heavily scarred cheek and stubble across his chin. The revolver in his hand held steady, the hammer was fully cocked and a finger rested on the trigger.

“Well it certainly bleeding looks like she found her way in herself in here at some point since then,” Jake – or Jaekal as was his name in full – spoke in an utterly cold tone. “Who the fuck are you?”

Jesse’s blue eyes trailed over Jake’s rugged features. Then down at the pretty blonde woman, still motionless, asleep and stinking of whiskey. Ellie was her name, they had just met a few hours ago at the Maiden’s Whisper. They had come back to her place after a wicked amount of whiskey, he remembered.

“I got no idea what this is about, a’ight?” With a hoarse and high-pitched tone Jesse carried on speaking, hoping to sound more convincing than the voice at the back of his head.”But if somethin’ happened….it ain’t on me because I swear I got in here alone!”

Ellie drew a deeply comfortable breath, humming lowly against his chest. In a lazy motion she nuzzled in a little closer to hug her bedfellow. Jesse’s eyes shot back up to the pistol and the man behind, seeing his jaw tighten and his grip grow firmer.

“I’m Jesse! Now look, if… if you’re gonna go about firin’ that gun you might wanna know that I ain’t done shit b’fore you start–”

“I asked for your fucking name, you ball bag!” Jaekal scowled, leaning in a little to make the threat of bullet-to-the-head ever so clear.

“I just told ya damnit! It’s Jesse! What is this, some kinda prank?!”

The question had Jaekal snarling, and for a moment it looked as though he was about to strike the unwelcome guest  across the face with the heavy iron pistol. He gritted his teeth and looked to his woman, so comfortably hugging another man.

“Prank? My fucking wife is sprawled all over you with her cunt on show, think that’s fucking funny? Wake the bitch up, see which one of you I’ll do first.”

Jesse inhaled a deep breath with growing tension.

“Look man, I– shit, alright, I’m wakin’ her up… Just relax.”

Twisting a little in bed he laid a hand on Ellie’s shoulder, shaking her hurriedly.

“Wake up!”

“What’d you do, ply her with a few drinks ’til she opened her legs up?” Jake spat out accusingly. “Thought you’d follow her back to my home? My fucking home!

The woman’s reactions were slow and sleepy. With half closed eyes she slowly raised her head up off Jesse’s shoulder. When catching sight of her husband she flinched back wildly, slapping both hands over her mouth to stifle a scream.

“She dragged me here!” Jesse protested. “I don’t remember no tumblin’ in bed with her either! I remember fallin’ asleep… on me own! I don’t know what’s goin’ on!”

Elle’s muffled screeching changed. She fell forward, dropping in over Jesse’s chest, laughing so hard it made her belly cramp. Jesse’s head slowly turned to look at her.

“What the fuck?”

The statement could barely be heard over the fit of hysterical laughter. Jesse squinted his eyes and looked from wife to husband, slowly catching on. His shoulders dropped with a deep sigh of relief.

The scowl on Jaekal’s face slowly morphed into a grin. He moved his arm, aiming the pistol down at the floor and then squeezed the trigger. The empty chamber gave nothing but a loud click. The naked woman wheezed with laughter.

“Shit!” she snorted, patting Jesse’s chest and pulling herself up to sitting. A cackling laugh came from her husband too and his expression filled up with mirth.

“Got yourself to blame, you knobrash.” Jaekal smirked, holstered the pistol and took a step back.

“By Lyssa’s tits…” Jesse breathed, pushing up to sitting and swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. The woman was on him before he could get far, pressing her tits up against his back and wrapping her arms around him in a warm hug. Jesse ran a hand down his face and came to scratch his jaw, listening to her snickering. How the hell could he fall for that? “Fuckin’…. Damn.”

Ellie leaned out to the side and twisted around to look at his face, squinting her eyes. The snickering stopped.

“So we didn’t?! I don’t even remember goin’ to bed!”

“Oh c’mon!” Jesse groaned and peered from the whiskey-stinking blonde to her still chuckling husband. “You already half-way got me there!”

“I’m serious!” Ellie spouted through another fit of laughter. “I don’t remember shit!”

“Ah man…” Jesse leaned forward to rest his head in his hands, closing his eyes. “… what time is it?”

Finally the woman’s arms left him, she crawled away and reached out for her husband, snatching him by the jacket and pulling him close. A smiling Jaekal wrapped his arms around her and leaned in, meeting her lips in a kiss.

“Hey hun.” Ellie grinned up at him. “I made a new friend. I don’t know ‘is name but we’re pretty sure we didn’t fuck.”

Jesse refrained from stating his name a third time. Pushing through the haze of hangover and lingering drunkenness he got up off the bed, rubbing his face and trying to avoid looking straight at the couple. Standing up he found his pants starting to drop, the belt holding them up being unbuckled. Hastily he pulled himself together, buckling up and clearing his throat.

“He ain’t got no bruises so I figure not,” Jaekal smiled down at his wife. “Ain’t no blood either. You’re a fuckin’ unpleasant drunk fuck darlin’.”

In the most awkward of moves Jesse managed to squeeze past Jaekal and headed for the door, driven by a highly understandable urge to get the hell out.

“Aww yer leavin’?”

Ellie turned towards him with a brilliant smile, still not bothering to cover up. Jesse’s gaze flickered down over her chest but quickly rose to her face again. What the hell would he tell his girlfriend? Perhaps, perhaps best not to tell. He took a deep breath and nodded to himself. Definitely.

She was still speaking. Saying something about coffee. He rubbed his face and squinted his eyes, looking back at the smiling couple. Who the fuck even thinks of coffee after–

“Well,” Jesse muttered tiredly. “I guess a hungover man can’t say no to coffee.”






2 thoughts on “*Click*

    1. Thank you! ❤ It was really just a hastily done thing without much editing, which I kinda see now I should have done before posting. But oh well, it is what it is now! A follow-up piece should turn up at some point during the weekend too!

      Liked by 1 person

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